Triple the Trouble
by Sylvia Snape
Summary: Post series 4. Compatible with most of Journey's End, but AU. To prevent the metacrisis from killing her, Donna must stay with the Human!Doctor. Forever. Well, isn't that just wizard.


Written for prompt at livejournal community stillbrilliant. First Doctor Who story. Today, I finished it and am posting instead of finishing my summer work. Lovely. Enjoy!

* * *

Donna leaned against the coral happily. The TARDIS was flying smoothly, acting like a proper spaceship at last. Strangely enough, Donna didn't enjoy getting bruises when the ship rattled around in the Vortex. If the Doctor fixed the chameleon circuit then it would have a bit of style as well. She looked over at the Doctor piloting the TARDIS and grinned. Who needed him? She could fix that circuit on her own, she was sure of it.

The Doctor standing next to her, who had been sneaking looks at Rose, now looked curiously at Donna. "How are you feeling?"

"Brilliant!" She turned her head to face him. "Why so worried, space boy?"

"Doesn't your head hurt? All that knowledge crammed in there?"

"Nope! All those worlds, all those aliens!" she mused in wonder. "I don't understand why you keep going back to Earth of all places."

"Oi! Don't complain! I saved you from the Sontarans and the Daleks, didn't I?"

Donna looked for strength. She found it in Captain Jack's grin. "I get to choose where we go next."

The Doctor sighed. "It doesn't seem likely that I'm going to be invited along."

Donna suddenly realized what both of the Doctors must be thinking. "The Daleks weren't going to go away because they felt a bit dizzy."

"Even if it is a brilliant way to deal with them." He grinned at Donna. "I always said that you were special!" She didn't look impressed. "I did say the coincidences must be leading up to something," he tried again.

"Those were just the reverberations of time caused by the temporal anomaly in the Medusa Cascade," she said, trying to suppress the feeling of smugness.

The Doctor looked worried again. "You're sure you're not in any sort of pain? Maybe," he paused, squinting at her, "Do you feel the intelligence slowly slipping away?"

"Only when chatter away about bananas." She slapped him on the arm for good measure. "Stop being so cryptic!"

"Just think, Donna, about the metacrisis," he urged a bit impatiently.

She concentrated on that word, and as though a book had opened in her mind, she had a flash of enlightenment. _A metacrisis may have any number of effects, depending on the kind of energy triggering it, the duration of the contact, and the compatibility between the two subjects. Between members of the same species, it can be used as simply an exchange of information. The transformation is most striking between vastly differing species, and often creates a unique sort of being, unlikely to be formed again in the same way. (In some cultures, the metacrisis is an acceptable form of marriage.) In similar species, the metacrisis can go horribly wrong. Certain physiological differences are often overlooked, creating only very rough organisms, which may be incapable of sustained life. This is made common by the vast number of humanoid species (see _Coincidence and the Will of the Universe_)._

"What?!" Donna yelped just as the TARDIS landed. Her outburst was drowned out by the cheers, and, momentarily forgetting her discovery, she joined in the celebration.

* * *

While the group tracked down the moon and pulled it back into the Earth's orbit, Donna stayed quiet and out of the way, thinking over her fate. It wasn't fair that the Doctor's martyr complex would kill her. She cast aside the foreign memories that had suddenly assaulted her and concentrated on finding some way — some trick, some gadget — that could save her. The longer she thought about it, the more sure she was that the Doctor was going to wipe her memories. Once that future had settled in her mind, she couldn't seem to shake it off.

She wanted to be angry at her Doctor for not foreseeing this, but she couldn't. He was being punished too, for something that wasn't really his fault. The Doctor was returning _all _of them to Earth, like a little boy cleaning up his toys, putting them in his closet until it was time to play again.

* * *

Donna hugged Sarah Jane and Martha goodbye, promising to call. As she hugged Jack, she slipped her phone number into his pocket. As soon as they were outside with the Doctor, Donna turned to the other alien. "I'm dying and everyone is still celebrating," she hissed.

"You're alright for a little while longer!" he said quickly. "I think it might be because you're still near me."

"I haven't even touched you," she snapped.

"Well," he started thoughtfully, "there are all sorts of electrical impulses working in your mind. After all, memories and thoughts aren't strictly physical. My mind might be a source of stability. It _is_ being woefully underused at the moment," he added.

"Right, since you're such a special snowflake," she stopped abruptly as Mickey came up to them to say goodbye. He had been talking to Rose and her mum, and it seemed that he was getting off on an earlier stop than they had expected.

Once the two had a bit of privacy again, the Doctor finally answered Donna. "I may have lost some of my Time Lord senses, but I can still see _your_ timeline. That should prove that we're still connected."

"Well, I'll still be alive when he wipes my memories." Donna was suddenly struck by the unfairness of it all. "He's leaving you all in that parallel world — and he's abandoning me, too! Oh, I'll clobber him."

This Doctor grinned, a bit cautiously. "That won't change his mind."

"But — don't you want to be with Rose?"

"Do you?" She raised her hand to smack him, but he continued quickly, "We all have the same memories, but none of the emotions that go along with them."

Donna could tell that he was telling the truth, but the Doctor returned in that moment.

"Right, off we go again," he said with a grin.

"Let us drive this time," Donna said abruptly.

"You don't know—"

"Yes we do. Go on, talk to them," she added with a genuinely fond smile, nodding her head at the Tylers.

Driving the TARDIS together, Donna and her Doctor got another chance to talk. The Doctor was a fair distance away, talking the Tylers in whispers.

"Would you prefer to stay here?" She resisted the urge to add, "with me."

"First instinct is to stay with the TARDIS," he said with a nod.

"We could leave _him_ there," Donna suggested with a smirk.

"Donna!" he scolded.

"I may have an idea," she said quietly.

"I'm game."

But before they could discuss it further, the Doctor was at Donna's side. "What have you done?" He was already flicking switches and checking the readouts on the monitor, as if she couldn't do a simple trans-dimensional jump.

Donna smacked him in the back out the head. "Brilliant, remember?" But she backed away to let him drive. This would be her only chance.

"Men!" she said loudly as she approached the Tylers.

Rose smiled fondly as them. "They're worth it."

"Only if you like running, adventure and skinny aliens."

"Don't forget the life-threatening danger," Jackie added, almost tolerantly — for her anyway.

"You two really came a long way," Donna said.

"The Doctor wouldn't stand by and let the universe blink out of existence," Rose said.

"Trust me, I know," Donna said, tapping her forehead. "But I also know," she added with a fresh burst of energy, "that you have got to stay put in one universe."

Before Donna even had to ask, Jackie handed her the dimensional hopper. Feeling a spark of regret, she stuck it in her coat pocket. "This sure is impressive, but I don't think you'll need it anymore."

"That won't stop her."

"No, but you can," Donna said confidently as she hugged Jackie.

The sentimental exchange was interrupted as the TARDIS made a bumpy landing. The women steadied each other, and Donna bid Rose goodbye. "I could have done better," Donna mumbled petulantly, getting one last grin from Rose and Jackie.

The Doctor and Rose were the first to leave. Jackie kept a short distance behind them, trying to give them some semblance of privacy. Donna's Doctor wavered behind, watching her carefully. When she handed him the dimensional hopper, he smiled sadly and put it in his pocket. She let him lead the way out to Bad Wolf Bay.

* * *

Rose was startled by the sound of the TARDIS dematerializing and let go of the Doctor's hand, running forward a little to try to catch the blue box. The Doctor winced; this moment of distraction meant that he had a chance to get away after all. Even worse, he only had moments to make it in.

It really wasn't fair on him. There he was, barely an hour old, and already he was being dumped from the nest. He couldn't leave Donna. On the other hand, it would be cruel to do it to Rose again. Still, he couldn't leave his TARDIS. Before he could change his mind again, he plunged his hand into his pocket and blinked out of existence.

"Doctor!" It was Jackie who shouted out first, but Rose joined in most earnestly as well. "I'll do it again!" she shouted to the water. "I'll be back with you!"

* * *

"You are not going to wipe my memories!" Donna was craftily making sure that the TARDIS controls were between them at all times.

"Now, be reasonable."

"You've just dumped all of us!" She took a big step to the left to keep him from getting too close.

He took a long quavering breath before saying, "All of you mean the world to me—"

"I think you mean 'universe'." The voice that said this was more lighthearted than the previous, but strikingly similar all the same.

Donna grinned in relief, feeling her pounding headache subsiding already. The Doctor, on the other hand, settled for spinning around and looking bug-eyed. "What did you do?"

"Same thing you would've done if you hadn't been feeling so guilty."

The Doctor ignored this accusation, for he had just noticed the dimensional hopper in his double's hand. "Those things rip holes in the fabric of reality."

"Lucky you just mended mine, then, isn't it?" Her Doctor was wandering around the console, stroking it fondly.

The Doctor collapsed into the jump seat and put his head in his hands. "How could you do that Rose?"

"We're not here to air out your dirty laundry." The Doctor was about to interrupt, but he continued, "Notice that Donna looks alright again and is piloting the TARDIS to some unknown destination."

"Donna!" In his rush to get to her, the Doctor stumbled out of his seat rather ungainly and ended up almost falling.

"My head feels fine, thanks for the concern," she said, rather distracted.

"Ha!" her Doctor exclaimed, rushing over to her to try to get a hug.

"Busy!"

"I'll help!" he said, just as eagerly.

"The consequences—" the Doctor started, but he stopped when the TARDIS materialized.

"You can see the time-lines better than I can. You can't tell me that this won't work," her Doctor said.

When the Doctor didn't argue, Donna rushed over to him, grabbing his hands. "_Will_ it work?"

"Yes," he said reluctantly.

"I can stay! Brilliant!" Donna hugged the Doctor eagerly. Her Doctor rushed over to get a hug, too.

"It wouldn't be the same without you," the Doctor said, finally grinning at her. "But the two of you are stuck together. Forever."

* * *

"Where are we?"

Donna rushed past the Doctor, grabbing the other one's hand to drag him along. "Come and see!"

The three of them went outside together. They had walked into a large clearing that was positively covered in large, colorful tents. There were all sorts of beings wandering around, chatting away happily. In the background, there seemed to be enormous purple tents. When the wind picked up for a moment, the tents leaned to the left.

"Feltspoon!" her Doctor exclaimed. "Aww, brilliant! I haven't been here in decades!"

"We got here a bit late, though. It's all... tourist-y," the Doctor said, sticking out his tongue in disgust.

The two of them suddenly looked at each other, noticing that they were alone. "Donna!" they shouted together, plunging into the crowd.

They were relieved to see that she hadn't gone far. One of the vendors was convincing her to buy a piece of the remarkable Feltspoon rock. "Take it! Hold it! Touch it — it won't budge. Blow on it — it bends! You try it!" He nudged the miniature mountain towards her with his single arm.

Donna gritted her teeth as she squeezed the rock between her hands. The furry blue vendor was hopping up and down in his eagerness. She even brought it to her mouth to try to bite through it.

"Rock candy, that stall!" The vendor hopped to his left. The Doctors exchanged a grin and went off in search of the sweets, deciding Donna was safe enough for the moment. "Blow on it! Blow, blow, blow!"

"Alright, keep your fur on!" Donna said with a grin, examining the purple rock again. She blew gently, and was delighted to see the tip lean away from her for a moment. Donna tried to shape it in her hands again, but it was rock solid.

She took a deep breath and blew on the rock, simultaneously trying to mold it with her hands. She ran out of breath without accomplishing her goal. She tried this several more times, before simply fanning it with her hand and watching it sway. Donna seemed pretty pleased with herself despite her apparent failure.

"You buy?" the hoppy vendor said hopefully.

Donna frowned now, letting the rock snap back into its original shape. "I don't have any money, though."

"You trade?"

Donna rifled through her pockets and came up with a stick of gum and a comb that she carried around occasionally. "That's all I have, sorry."

"I take!" The vendor hoped to his right, towards the comb.

"Deal!" Donna said with a grin. She placed the comb on the counter and put the rock and gum in her pocket. "I need more interesting pockets," she mused as she turned away to find the Doctors.

They were walking towards her, their lips as blue and sticky as their fingers. "Well, come on, I want to see them up close."

They walked towards an information tent, where a many-tentacled alien was handing out pamphlets to the passersby. "See the amazing Feltspoon Mountains up close. There's nothing like the first hand experience. If you're feeling adventurous, take a hike!"

One of the aliens floating around the tent approached their trio. "Would you like a tour guide?"

"Can we really hike up there?" the Doctor asked.

"Only the people here used to be very protective of their sacred mountains," the other one added.

Their guide blinked in surprise. The two of them were remarkable similar, even to someone quite used to dealing with unusual looking foreigners. "We have been enlightened, and now wish to share our great gift."

"Brilliant!" the Doctors exclaimed simultaneously, causing the tour guide to float away from them a little bit, as if repelled by their enthusiasm.

"We haven't introduced ourselves yet, have we?" the Doctor said.

"This is Donna, and I'm the Doctor," Donna's Doctor added helpfully.

"And I'm _the_ Doctor!" the Doctor added.

The tour guide bobbled her head politely, but Donna groaned. "I'm awfully sorry. My brothers do like to make an impression." With a grin, she tried to start again. "I'm Donna Noble, and these are my brothers, John and James." She pointed first to the Doctor in the brown suit, and then to her Doctor in the blue suit. "They're both doctors, and think that it's a wonderful joke to act this way." The Doctors made faces at each other, as if insulted by Donna's introduction.

The tour guide didn't seem bothered. "We have great respect for twins," she said simply, and their tour began. It went quite well, until one of the Doctors wandered off the beaten track and insulted the local fauna.

* * *

"Do you still want to see Charlie Chaplin?" the Doctor asked eagerly.

"Yes, but we need to discuss something first," Donna said, leading the way to the library, where there were comfy chairs to sit in.

"I was on my best behavior at your house!" her Doctor protested. "I didn't mean to bother your mum while she was cooking. I was just hungry. I hadn't ever eaten before, you know!"

"That not what I meant. Mind you, I never knew that she had such a good throwing arm," Donna said with a grin, entering the library first and claiming the sofa so that she could lie down.

"And I didn't know that a fork could stick in my hair," the Doctor added, also grinning.

"That could have been you!" her Doctor said, crossing his arms over his chest as he sat down, too.

"Exactly," Donna interrupted. "We can't go around calling you both 'the Doctor'."

"Why not?" they asked simultaneously.

Donna didn't answer that particular question. "I'd try to give you a normal name, but you wouldn't be too happy with that."

"Oh, I don't know — I was thinking of Donald for him," the Doctor said cheekily.

"Oh right, that'll be clever. Donna, Donald and Doctor, here to solve your problems."

"Everyone will be speechless," Donna agreed.

"Yeah, tongue-tied," her Doctor said.

"How about the Sergeant?" the Doctor suggested.

The other Doctor frowned. "Will you drop that?"

"Well, Captain and Brigadier are out," Donna said thoughtfully. "It's a pity since 'Captain' works best. There's Major, General, Lieutenant, Commander... Commodore, if you like."

"I thought you were on my side," her Doctor said petulantly. "But Lieutenant sounds pretty good."

"It could be useful for us," the Doctor admitted.

"No, that's not right," Donna said, shaking her head. "Hold on, I'll think of it." There was a long silence, and the Doctors began to suspect that she had fallen asleep when she suddenly sat up. "I got it!"

"Well, don't keep us in suspense," her Doctor said.

"The Professor!"

"The Professor?" he repeated doubtfully.

"Yep!"

"Are you sure?"

"What's wrong with it?" Donna asked. "It's a normal title. It's no weirder than calling someone 'Doctor'."

"Well, yes," the Professor started.

"It gives you the proper authority, and puts you on the side of the good guys," Donna added.

"I don't really feel like a professor," he said.

"You can be an eccentric one. That shouldn't be too difficult for you."

"Professor it is!" the Doctor said happily. This would be much easier for him, too, though he would never admit that.

"Now, the clothes," Donna said threateningly as she stood up.

"To the wardrobe!" the Professor said happily.

* * *

Donna walked into the kitchen. The first few days had been a bit hectic, but eventually the Doctor and the Professor had straightened out their similarities. They had also learned that Donna only had the memories of the latest incarnation. The Professor, however, didn't seem to lack anything that the Doctor had. Except perhaps common sense.

"What did you do?" Donna shrieked as she caught sight of him.

"I thought that it was obvious," he said, returning to making breakfast. Donna and the Doctor were both helpless in the kitchen, but the Professor seemed to quite enjoy himself.

Donna had to admit that it was obvious. "Why did you dye your hair?" she asked helplessly as she sat down.

"I've always wanted to be ginger," he said with a grin. "Didn't I ever mention that?"

"Well, you can explain it to the Doctor," Donna said, taking a mug of tea from the middle of the table.

"Explain what to me?" The Doctor walked in, his hair even more ruffled than usual. His eyes bulged out when he caught sight of the Professor. "I should have thought of that first!" he whined.

"That just proves I'm better than you, doesn't it?" the Professor said proudly.

Donna groaned. It was going to be another long day.

"Professor!" Donna shouted. Her voice carried all the way to the console room.

He squeaked, and crouched down on the floor to get out of sight.

"What did you do?" the Doctor asked him in a hushed voice, but the Professor simply shook his head and kept quiet.

"I can tell that you're in here, you know!"

This time, the Doctor jumped, taken by surprise, since Donna was right behind him. "I have to... go get something," he stammered and bolted from the room.

"What happened to my straightener?" she asked.

"Well, if you misplaced it, I can help you look for it."

Donna was suddenly next to him. "I don't think so."

He stood up quickly. "Now, Donna, be reasonable."

"Where is my straightener?" she asked slowly.

"I have no idea!" he said as he backed away from her.

She advanced on him. "Professor, you wouldn't be lying to me, would you?"

"Well, I _may_ have needed two ceramic plates..." he said quietly.

She grabbed him by the shoulder of his green sweater. "Then you're going to Earth and buying me a new one, aren't you?"

He tried to squirm out of her grip, but she held tight. He hung his head and shuffled his feet. "Yes, mum."

"Oi! Don't get cheeky!"

"Anyone want a sandwich?" the Doctor asked politely as he returned.

* * *

Donna got over her urge to take things apart and make them more sonic only a month after the metacrisis. She supposed it was because she was a temp, and never got too caught up in one activity. Still, she never felt the need resist that particular urge when the object in question was broken. The Doctor and the Professor had learned that lesson when they let her visit Torchwood.

The Professor, on the other hand, liked to follow his instincts, and practically nothing could stop him from tinkering with the machinery. Unfortunately, he also liked to hang around Donna. She had imprinted on him like a mother goose does on her chicks.

People had begun to assume that Donna and the Professor were a couple, and gave the Doctor very funny looks as result. The Doctor began to enjoy running for his life even more. That didn't give people enough time to consider their relationship. He sulked for a very long time when Donna began wearing her bio-damp ring.

Luckily for the Doctor, Donna and the Professor were also quick to get on each other's nerves. The early days were horrible, but once the Doctor picked up a few new companions, he was quite happy with the situation.

"PROFESSOR!"

The Doctor grinned. He had replaced her conditioner with her body wash last night. Sometimes it was good to have a clone. "So, Luke, do you want to visit your mum and K-9?"


End file.
